Resident Statician at Hell’s construction department has revealed that Hell has gathered stones used by Nigerians to criticize the devil and hopes to ship same to help rebuild the religious battered country.
Demon Get Working and Stop Whining, who was placed in charge of the stones gathering by Lucifer The Devil, revealed that the selected stones which were of millions of sizes, thousands of colors and of very many shapes, consist of: materials needed to build the West African country.
According to the Demon who spoke elaborately with our reporter, hell is tired of millions of Nigerians waking up every day, casting and stoning satan for nothing.
“Nigerians have aspirations but they lack stones of resilience and determination to build their nations, he said.
“It is an attitude problem, it is quicker for Nigerians to blame the devil for every of their problems, than to seek solutions to solve them.
“In Nigeria, It is better loved when the process is easy and fast, that is why casting, binding and stoning the devil, dominate many headlines than news of breakthroughs and innovation.
“From hell, we hear of prophecies of heavy rains taking over with darkness, and from pulpits, religious leaders try to make members conform to deceits through sermons and Satan wonders if spiritual laws of dedication to duty are no more.
“Nigerian People no doubts, are an ambitious bunch like the Chinese but we have less stone gathering from the Asians because they chose to work it out rather than pray it through.
“These stones of gold, diamonds, talents, thoughts etc, gathered will be beneficial to help rebuild the country, giving it a solid foundation.
“The stones which are already marked out for onward shipping, will arrive and all Nigerians will be required to pick up shovels, chisels, trucks, saws and every tool needed to commence work.
“They will be expected to drop the religious books for a while as no Nigerian will be left out. You must be doing something to Nigeria, and not asking for something to be done for you when the stones arrive.
“We wash our hands from Nigeria’s problems, he concluded